An Era Comes To An End!!

“What is the hardest thing for you to do?” If someone ask you that question what your answer will be? How you will comprehend the answer and after that how will you find the right words to say? If someone comes up to me and ask me then I would say that the hardest thing for me is to say goodbye.

Goodbyes in general cause me immense pain. I feel pang in my heart as the time comes near to bid farewell. That is why I have always been found crying at farewell parties. Four years, is a goddamn long phase. And the four years in University are the shortest longest period of my life. Shortest because they passed like the blink of an eye and longest because they taught me lessons wayyyy too many. Now as I am sitting down and writing I am suddenly recalling all the memories that I have had in these four years, be it good ones or bad ones. There were so many instances when I felt truly happy and blessed to be around people who genuinely cared for me. These four years have been the best (apart from the gossip(s) that I got to know about me well because, you could have asked me first before considering it true. Whoever did that, cheers mate you made life extremely easy for me I swear🙃 )

I have never been good with goodbyes. Why? Well because I cry to the point that there is left no difference between my nose and a cute tomato. (My narcissism shows how I am calling my nose cute.) And when you have spent your four years with specific people around you, you feel like you will be doing the hardest goodbye at the end. I thought that I won’t be crying when these four years come to an end, that I won’t be missing this place because God knows how many horrible memories I have of this place. Yet here I am, feeling the corner of my eyes getting wet, writing down the memories with pain.

Goodbyes are very strange.It might leave you teary and sad but it might be the reason your life falls right into place. I cannot say anything about you but for me, it definitely will leave me teary. There are so many people I want to thank today, so many people who made me become a better learner, a better person, a bit rational and who made me look at things from new perspective.

First of all the Teachers who, without them knowing that they are, became an inspiration. I am not going to name anyone because that’s for the mystery part, let us all guess who is who but there are teachers who have given me a purpose. A teacher who has made me to believe that you can be the boss without actually being the boss. A teacher who has taught me how to deal with people who are constantly at your back, trying to get to you. A teacher who taught me how to not care about anyone around you and do your job. A teacher who has given me an inspiration to be strong willed and determined in all phases of life. A teacher who has taught me the meaning of life in such a subtle way that you can never imagine and well there are simply a (few) who made me question this degree, whether that is the right attitude for teaching, and even my life (I dont know if I mean offence here or not, but for sure I am hurt by those teacher(s)) There are teachers who I couldn’t get the chance to be taught by and I feel sad about it as well. I owe a huge part of my life to them because they have made me and are making me who I am today and will be in future.

I want to start by mentioning the two most favourite because life at GCU was easier because of them. First of all there is this talented, empowering, beautiful and the best person known as Arhaba Waseem Toor. She is the best person well because she has always been there to listen to my nonsense and never ever told me to shut-up. She has been the biggest emotional support in GCU, (it may seem like we hangout each day, we don’t, we barely met on campus but whenever we did, she always greeted me like an elder sister.) She has helped me with all the trauma that my studies and a few teachers gave me and, even helped me in studying. Thank you so much Arhaba Baji, we still need to take at least one picture so I can have it as a memory of yours.

The second in line is the Ahmazing Ahsan Bhai. The credit goes to Arhaba Baji here as well because she introduced us. I, being the total dumbass, wasn’t able to get my topics approved and was freaking out well because you all know the start of Junior year was not really a cup of tea for us. He helped me with the topics and no matter how many time they got rejected (total 7 times man) he kept thinking about new ones and helped me with them. If I passed that particular subject, I owe it all to him. I swear I do. THANK YOU AHSAN BHAI YOU REALLY HELPED ME IN PASSING THE SUBJECT!!!

The two people I would like to mention are Salyha baji and Aleena Baji. They were the warmth in GCU when I felt cold and alienated. They have always been my happy pill in GCU. They are the talented, gorgeous, warm people who have always met me with kindness and love. Thank you so much for making my four years stay at GCU the best.

Now comes the class. Well, there have been many people in the class with whom I have not really gotten much time to spend and I wish that we had more time to spend(we still can do that so if you’re reading this let’s make memories). But, there were a lot of people who have been the kindest souls in these four years. I won’t be mentioning any names but let’s get started.

Thank you to the friend who gave me the hug I needed when I came out of the exam hall and my heart was sinking back in semester II.

Thank you to the friend who ditched literature’s class for me back in semester I and we sat in amphitheatre under the sun having deep conversations.

Thank you to the friend who hugged me tightly, took the piece of cake and fed me on my birthday. We didn’t even know each other at that time really well. Thank you for showing me kindness.

Thank you to the friend who has always been the kindest soul in times of need, who replied me on WhatsApp and helped me with studies.

Thank you to the person who has been my emotional support in such a subtle way that you can never imagine.

Thank you to the friend who showed me that you must never judge a book by its cover. And that the paratha roll at GCU is really worth trying.

Thank you to the friend who has listened to my meltdowns in semester VII and gave me the warmest hugs, who helped me qith studies, encouraged me for so many things, appreciated my ideas, shared the homemade lunch with me. I wish I could rewind the time just to be your close friend.

Thank you to the friend who is now looking out for me just like day 01, who has somehow always been the home. Who is now the reason I have no worries at my back.

Thank you to the friend who helped me with my messed-up life and mind, who encouraged me to write, who helped me to write. Who has been the first to praise me. Who has been the first to hear my meltdowns. Who made me strong.

Thank you to the friend who took all of my pieces and glued them back together and is still holding on to my gross glued structure.

Thank you so much to the friend who silently stayed by my side until baba came to pick me up without making the impression of it.

Thank you to the friend who always talks to me nicely and has given me warm hugs.

Thank you to the people who made my three years beautiful, who helped me create beautiful memories.

Thank you to the friends who accompanied me to the Drama Fest back in Semester I.

Thank you to the friend who praised me for my mediocre poems and prose.

Thank you to everyone who showed up for Joyland after just one text of mine, we had great memories that day. And I AM THANKFUL. I loved that day and I will always remember you all.

Thank you to the friend who helped me pass semester IV exams (the poetry one in particular).

Thank you to the friend who helped me in clearing my concepts and always hyping me up even though I am not half as intelligent as they are.

Thank you the the friends who helped me pass the Prose’s mid back in Semester VI.

Thank you to the friend who gifted me a knitted hot air balloon with two cute clouds. Who did my piercings and who has the warm beautiful personality like the sun.

Thank you to the friend who stood behind my back throughout these four years.

Thank you to the friends who made a safe place for me to rant that day so that I can take everything out of my heart.

Simply put, thank you to each and every person in my class who helped me laugh, smile, feel warm, blessed and who helped me in knowing the definition of love. GCU wouldn’t have been meaningful place without you all. Let’s make fun memories in these few months that are now left. I will be missing you all so much but just know that It Is Not A Goodbye.

Love you all💜

Maryam🦋